As of yesterday i am being forced to quit any form of entertainment/communications. (that means FFXI,the forums, music, phone, tv, pretty much everything i do)

i'd like to share my screwed up story on why and how this came to be.

First off, my dad is like the next one up to satin.

I've been grounded like 3/4's of my life because of my dad. Sometimes for being stupid and other times just because he feels like i should be punished for some bullshit reason that he could mkae up or exagerate. (i am one of the most "cleanest" kids i know, i have never killed anyone, never done drugs, never been suspended or gotten detention. hell i dont even have a police record). He would just make up rules that counter any single thing i do and not even tell me why he did this and that or why he disagrees. Then when i ask him why, he responds "I don't have to have a reason"

I get along with EVERYONE except for my dad, put me face to face with the virgin mary, or some crazy ass drunk and i will get along with them more then my own father. i cant even have a conversation with him, a comment will turn inot an argument, its either he's right, or im grounded, and even if i do agree with him in the end, im grounded for doubting his knowledge in the first place

Now he's just gone over the edge by yelling at me that i have no common sense and that im stupid. all because i left a computer program overnight.

i left POL on overnight to update w/e update we had and for some reason he gets on MY computer and grounds me because,
1.) I never asked to get on MY compuer,
2.) i didnt ask to use the internet connection which I bought and pay for, 3.)i didnt ask if i could update a game on MY computer of which i pay for. 4.) because i left the window open whiel i wasnt using it, "Showing Irresponsibility (sp?) and lack of any and all common sense".

Then for some stupid ass reason he grounded me from everything because i had a 79% in Earth in Space Science which was like 3 months ago.

And he considers this to be a very bad thing and that because my grades are not Perfect A's he feels the need to send me back to a harder school, and to top it off its a catholic school which i flunked out of last year because it was way too hard.

now i can understand that it was a C and its not acceptable but he completely took all my freedoms away from me. it's gotten to the point were i have to ask if i can do my friggin homework, i know sounds completely retarded but its true you can ask arim.

Now i have to come home from school and read until my dad says its ok that i can do my homework, i wouldnt be surprised if he came in and yelled at me because i read wrong or some crap like that.

My dad says i should have at least 5-6 hr's of homework each night even on weekends, and that just doesnt happen at a public high school.

he also took almost all of my clothes away because i decided to shave my legs once, ONE FUCKING TIME! he said i have no reason to shave my legs and hes concerned that i shaved my legs.

I can only see 2 of my friends out of school because the parentals have met, and because Arim argued with my dad to let me see some daylight.

these are only the recent events that have happened in the past 2 days, this bullshit has been going on since 3rd grade.

Right now i wish my dad would just hit me or something like that so i can call child services and arim's parents can take me in so i can live with him and actually have a life.

my dad has actually made me cry because hes such a jackass and thinks i should be just like him. My friggin grandma even told him that hes raising me the wrong way and that he's a horrible father, My grandma his mom for christ sake!

He even said these exact words "God put you on this earth to serve me." And he meant it.

Now father is making me quit the game because he belives it's cutting into my studies (of which ive been grounded from for almost 7months) and my daily work at home (Which changes daily to w/e he fucking feels like it should be)

I've managed to make deals with him such as, if i clean the house i can play the game for 30 mins, and he says "ok thats fine" but when i clean the house and start to play he comes in an acts like nothing ever happened, and grounds me.

i would never consider suiside because i know that this will not last forever, and my life HAS to get better at some point. right now i have no idea what to do or what to think, after talking to my friends and teachers at school, they said they would have run away a long time ago. i know some people have some fucked up lives, but this is jes bullshit.

i have talked to arim about everything and he said "fuck i would come over there and pick you upright now if my mom wasnt out with the car, and deal with your parents myself" i know he is there for me and he told me to call him the next time somthing fucking retarted goes down to call him right then and to pack my stuff and he will be at my house to pick me up right away.

i SO0O0O0o0o0o0oOOO0o0o~ wana leave and move in with arim but i cant even think of how that would go down, i can image what my parents would do/say to me if i ran away. i could NEVER go back.

ohh and if your wondering about my mom, i love my mom to death but she can help me out, she cant argue with my dad so all she can do is agree, what ever he says, she agrees.

so i am leaving FFXI and i will not be comming back this time, unless i move in with arim.

whats your opinion about the bullshit i have to live with? what would you do?

Ima look up everything i can to get your ass out of there, im sick and tierd of hearing your dad talk and even breath.

but i think you can call something for your parents belittling you and calling you stupid and dumb and tha yo worthless and they will make them go to a parenting class.

If not probly gonna have to tough it out till yo 18 and move in

i'm gonna key and teepee your dads car at his work then ima throw eggs at him once he leaves

Ike do this if you really wanna get away, next time your dad gives you shit cuss him out tell him off anything. Get him to hit you and boom your out of their. I wouldnt take that shit man, if it were me honestly id probably kill the guy by now because i get pissed easy.

You gotta stand up for yourself. What Led said is pretty much what I do when my dad gives me shit, exept for killing him of course.

_________________

I don't wanna say it but yeah Led is right. You're letting him treat you like you're his to do anything he wants with. I mean, yeah, he has a certain degree of control over you being your parent until you can sign for stuff under your own name.

Just rebel, in the end it sounds like there's nothing else he can do. What's he going to do, ground you? If he tells you you have to stay in your room just walk out and go eat something in the kitchen, if he yells at you to go back, say... No.

He can stand there and yell at you to "goto your room" until he's blue in the face if he wants to. You don't have to move anywhere. If he tries to drag you, just resist and stay where you are. You need to make him realize he doesn't have total control, make him realize that if what he asked was reasonable, you'd cooperate. If he yells to the point he's just pissing you off, yell back.

What else is he going to do? Take your PC from you? Sounds like he did that already. Stop you from watching TV? Sounds like he has that too. Refuse to feed you? That's probably just illegal. Chances are if he got pissed off enough he'd try to hit you, which i'm sure he knows he can't do, so if he did it'd be game over.

Just get into a shouting match or something. If he keeps yelling after you dont do what he says, yell back. If the shouting match isn't going anywhere, just walk out the door and say you won't come back until he starts respecting your rights as a person. Then just goto your Grandmothers, preferably your mothers side, and ask to stay there away from him. Tell them how he treats you and I doubt they'd let him into their house to get near you.

Summary: If you let him push you around he'll just keep doing it because he knows he can. You have to start not doing what he says, show him he can't control you. Obviously if he makes reasonable requests like "You can't play today unless you clean your room" then fine, but simple "I've decided you can't watch TV today because you're mine" -- you say "I'll do what I want."

Thats messed up Ike seriously. I hate parents like that. I mean mine were strict and I ended up acting out a lot but they had/have their reasons. Your dad just sounds like he needs to be in control all the time and seems to take things out on you. Thats no way to live and I suggest you leave with Arim if he keeps it up or threaten to leave. He will either get his head straight to keep you or not.

_________________

sorry to hear that ike but best thing I can tell you is when you hit 18 year old you just move out and there nothing he can do to stop you or even the cops so just move out at 18 yearold.

That is worse thing I ever seen in my life I even had a friend that did live with her parents and she 28 and still get told what to do and cant do so I told her to move out and stay here temp until she can get her own place. MAN that really pissed the parents off they even called the cops. you know what the cops said?? well cops told the parents that she is an adult and nothing they can do cuzz of the 18 year old or up. So now she is doing fine and happy that she can do what she wants to do on her own.

_________________
PS3 Friend list name: Pantherxx Wii code 1629-0463-4657-0263 (revised 9/28/07) Steam ID - Pantherxx010 62BLU 75PLD Reactived 7/5/10 I dare you Click this!

That's screwed up ike, controlling parents suck.

Personally, I don't let anyone control me, and you shouldn't either. Don't let him walk all over you like that, taking your things.

Ket has actually said everything I would say though =]

_________________
60 Undead Warrior *Coming for you C'thun!*
60 RDM Ifrit *retired*
10 BST Phoenix *leveling up!*

Right now you live at home rent free and the only job you have is to educate yourself. If this was a job you would have failed. It doesn't sound like your father is abusing you or anything. Wait until you get into the real world where you boss is an ass and you can't do anything about it cause you need to eat/pay something called rent.

_________________

erm rune, he's paying for things and his father is taking them away. Your boss at work may be an ass but he can't take your car away.

_________________
60 Undead Warrior *Coming for you C'thun!*
60 RDM Ifrit *retired*
10 BST Phoenix *leveling up!*

Actually he could, if he fired me T_T Let's see Ike pays 15 bucks a month for FFXI. His dad pays the other 99% of his life... i think his day has the right to take that away >_>' Don't mind me though, I will probably side more on his day side cause I'm not a kid anymore /cry

_________________

Paying for his room, board and food is one thing, but his father signed up for that when he decided to have a child. Everyone has pretty much summed up what you need to do. Stand up for yourself, I'm about like Led on this one... I'd probably have knocked him out by now...

_________________
75PLD 66RDM 50WAR
Rank 10 Bastok | Rank 10 Windurst | Rank 10 San d'Oria

He sounds pretty irrational from what your describing, I'll have to take your post with a little bias, but comments like. "

are a little scary. Basically, if hes not giving you any slack, then you'll just have to resist him to some degree. I don't know how you feel about your Dad on a deeper, emotional level, but remember ...

...
>,>

<,<

If he leaves a mark, he goes to jail. >,>

_________________
Retired 8/21/06
Don't click this link.

>.> geez... saying life isnt fair is one thing but that crosses the line...

my parents are sooo annoying sometimes but judging by your post, ike, id say you live, living hell >.<

_________________

depending on the state you live in there are different rules. i had a sililar situation when i was 15. not going to go into the entire details, but basically i did a little bit of studying a few laws in the area. i found that in NY there used to be a way for you to get emancipated, but has since been removed because the state considers you an adult enough to move out of your parents house at 16. so i acted and delt with his BS until i was 16 then at 2am i packed my stuff and snuck it out. havent lived at home since. he called the cops on me and they said "we cant force you to come home, but we can ask you to" which i said no thanks.

i planned this 8 months ahead of time and saved up money from a job i was working at. theres an up side and a down side to everything you do. you need to weigh in the negative and positive. i assume you are his first teenager that he's raised. my father didnt know teen's acted the way they did until well my brother started acting just like i did before i moved out.

if this is stressing you out, i suggest seeing your schools counsler or psychologist. tell them the amount of strain its putting on you. im sure outside channels can talk to your father. if that fails sign up for away from home programs. there are a few that you go away to live at the school and it is a substitute to high school. and look into what age the state legally considers you emancipated. if its 16 then you dont even need to listen to what he says, you can take your stuff and leave. if he throws you out then he is required to provide you with money for food clothing rent etc and can be aquired thru the court system, or let you live at the house again. he is also required to provide you with health insurance until the day you turn 19. good luck with everything and remember that being on your own is very rough.

_________________
75WHM / 37SMN / 61BLM / 37RDM / 70BRD / 75NIN / 75RNG / 56THF / 37WAR / 37DRG http://www.myspace.com/dan_wyld

>.> geez... saying life isnt fair is one thing but that crosses the line...

my parents are sooo annoying sometimes but judging by your post, ike, id say you live, living hell >.<

_________________

>.> geez... saying life isnt fair is one thing but that crosses the line...

my parents are sooo annoying sometimes but judging by your post, ike, id say you live, living hell >.<

_________________

wow i thought my parents were bad but mine were nice lol. Yea Ike dont take his crap. If he tells you hey you cant do _______ untill you do ____ then yea just do it but if he says "you cant do ____ because you are my bitch and everything i say goes tell him to fuck off. What he gonna do? kick you out(sounds good from what you have posted)? Hit you(well if he does just take it smile and call the cops)? Call the cops on you(lol they cant do anything to you for telling him to fuck off and if they actually came you could tell them whats really going on in the house and he'd probably be fucked) So dude the moralof the story is that the ball is in you're court he cant do shit to you and you need to learn that. If he sends you to a school u dont want to go to just dont do anything. If he watches u do you're homework just do it wrong. Get kicked out whatever. Its you're life and if its that bad because of him then just leave.




Nick

_________________

JOINING OF SIX!

Your father doesn't realize he's probably lost all connection to his son after he turns 18 for the rest of his life.

His problem =/

My ex-step father was the same way...hearing this seriously pisses me off. I literally spent the last 30 minutes before I started this reply outside on my balcony chain smoking because of how angry reading this made me.
From 2nd grade to the beggining of freshman year in highschool, I was grounded all of but maybe 5 months (seperate occaisions added together, not a full 5 month time span).
Where as you've been putting up with that shit for a longer span of time then I had to, I can tell you that you can atleast be happy your father didn't hit you like my ex step-father did me.
You may no longer be able to read this post, but if you are, I strongly urge you to take this advice:
Mental and emotional abuse is just as wrong as physical abuse, and you can very easily report him to your local CPS board all the same. Get the phone number, call them up, and get that fucker what he deserves.

I was too stupid to do that, but I am telling you right now to call CPS. The longer you LET that shit head do this, the worse it will continue to get.
My step father started off the same way yours is....controlling, condescending, insulting...When he saw that I no longer cared about his words and getting grounding, he started hitting me. I was still too stupid to call CPS. It all continued untill my mother finally split up with him. I was to stupid to ever call CPS through 8 years of it. EIGHT FUCKING YEARS of getting emotionally shat on, and beaten, ending only because THEY split up. They split when I was 14...I'm now 21.
I now have a serious hatred for not only him, but also my mother for never saying anything to stop it, and downplaying everything he did to the rest of my family. I have never seen him since they split, and it's all that much better as being bigger then I was back then, I'd kill the fucker the second I got within arms reach of him, smiling every second of it...It's something I've thought about on countless occaisions, and I always find myself grinning ear to ear by the time my thoughts change to other things.
Whenever I speak with my mother now a days, it always quickly turns into arguements, and we hardly speak to eachother in the first place, the fact that she refuses to acknowladge why I'm mad at her pissing me off further.
I'm just getting over severe issues about trusting people, where I would occaisionally having bouts of paranoid thoughts even about close friends and family. It's a lonely fucking life always expecting any act of kindness from somebody to be a farce in attempts to make you lower your guard for them to fuck you over.
It's been 2 years now since I've gotten over severe anger management problems where if I didn't take care to watch myself, I would go into fits of anger. I've broken my fingers and kunckles multiple times punching various types of walls and objects while in this fits.
Sound like something you'd want to look forward to? It's been a regular fucking Disney World. You don't think of it now, but even when he stops his abuse, it's going to continue fucking you up for a good while to come.

DO NOT put up with that shit the way I did. I am telling you RIGHT THE FUCK NOW to grab your phone and call CPS. My heead is, and will probably remain for the majority of my life, some what fucked up from all of it. My relationship with my family has gone to shit due to my mother's backing him up, and my family's believing him and her. And the blame sets as much on my shoulders as it does his for me being too much of a fucking idiot to call CPS. I'm offering you the best advice I can give, as someone who's been through the same shit, and extra...Don't you EVEN...FUCKING...THINK... about waiting it out...if you do, you're as much to blame for letting it continue, as he is for doing it.

The phone number should be inside of your phone book, or simply call 411 and ask them to direct you there.

_________________
MNK75 WAR44 NIN24
Goldsmithing 64.0+1 All subcrafts 10.0

Wow.. that's horrible. If you do argue with him.. I wouldn't cuss him out. Whenever my mom and I are yelling at each other, if something accidently slips out she'll get very upset and start yelling at me telling me not to say that instead, and she'll just automatically feel that I lost the argument. I don't know how your dad is but it seems like he'd get pissed if you called him an asshole for example.. I'd just call him exactly what he calls you back. Unless you WANT to get him pissed so he hits you and you can leave.. :-( I don't like thinking about that.

Have you ever tried guilt? Like saying "your ruining my life" "my life sucks" or something. Whenever I used guilt on my mom it works. The other day she made me come home from a friend's house 'cause she said she didn't know him very well.. so I said "Mom you are so mean, I am moving away in less than 2 months and I can't spend time with my closest friends" and that's how I really felt. I still had to come home but she felt so bad afterwards, she wanted to get me anything. Your dad seems kinda heartless though.. but it still doesn't hurt to try.

Ike i kinda know what your Going thru my Parents are almost just as bad. Like both my parent are like workaholics so dosen't matter what i do ti isn't Enough. I pay Rent now and my parents still act like i don;t and that pisses me off lol. i'm like 20 next month and they treat me like i'm still in HS lol. I have a job i make Rent they higher the Rent so i have to work more but b/c i can't get more hours they expect me to get a better job and there fore play Less FFXI. I do chores Walk the dog Clean what Ever thay want Recyleing Ect. And after all i think i do more Chores then Anyone in this house lol. but i get picked on b/c i play Video Games and i know it.. meh. The thing my parents are relizeding is the With Every rule they make i just don't do what they want... like raiseing rent... just means i keep my noraml job and i don't go out with Friends b/c i don't have the money to, so i play more FFXI lol. they say they are going to take my inernet and my comp away but... the comp was a B-day gift and i pay rent for internet so they can STFU and i tell them that. Personaly i think you can't have people always telling you what to do or they will just do it your whole life. do things when your Ready not when other are. I don't have the Best life but i know i'm liveing it how i want to Atm and i'm happy with that. (sorry in advance if half this didn't make sense)

_________________

/////// Log back tal we're waitin on you T_T go go bcnm ////////

*Off topic

_________________

Yeah Ike. I kinda knew your father was an ass the day i sent you that cat and he said he had to call my parents.... But good luck i guess. Good luck i guess. Now i feel bad that i have never been grounded or forced to do anything in my entire life. 'it makes me sick to hear this kind of stuff.

"So levi what do you have here? a cat? an ANTHRAX cat!?"